adarsh bhat’s blog

American singer-songwriter James Victor “Vic” Chesnutt ended his own life on Christmas Day by overdosing on his muscle relaxant medication.

Vic Chesnutt and his work were completely unfamiliar to me until I first heard his interview on NPR’s Fresh Air, which is hosted by the wonderful Terry Gross. Vic Chesnutt’s story, just like his music is very moving.

Vic Chesnutt (source: Wikipedia)

Vic Chesnutt met with an accident in 1983 while driving in a drunken state when he was eighteen. He broke his neck and partially damaged his spinal cord. Partially quadriplegic since then, he had limited movement below his neck and was restricted to a wheelchair.

He managed to gain some control back and was able to play simple guitar chords and sing again. Here is a sample of his music. This song is called “Flirted with you all my life” from his latest album “At the Cut”.

If you pay attention to the words of this song, the listener initially thinks that the singer is addressing a lover when he says “I flirted with you all my life, even kissed you once or twice.” But half-way through the song, it becomes obvious that he is not really addressing a lover, but death. In real life, Vic Chesnutt has had several brushes with death, which included several attempts at suicide both before and after his car accident in 1983.

He also says in his song, “clearly I was not ready.” In his early-December interview with Terry Gross, Vic said this was his break-up song with death — that he felt he wasn’t ready for death yet.

You know, I’ve attempted suicide three or four times,” he said. “It didn’t take. And this is really a breakup song with death.”

Here is another song by Vic Chesnutt: “Courage of the Coward.” I like it because of the intensity of both the words and of the musical arrangement.

During the interview Chesnutt said he wasn’t ready for death yet. He seemed very well put together and gave the feeling to all his listeners that he was not going to make another attempt on his own life.

I was personally very disturbed to hear recently that Vic Chesnutt took his life on Christmas day, just a few weeks after the original interview. He overdosed on prescription muscle relaxant. After two days in coma, he eventually succumbed.

Vic Chesnutt’s writing is very open, painful and transparent. In his own words:

Other people write about the bling and the booty. I write about the pus and the gnats. To me, that’s beautiful.

Here’s an example from the song “Panic Pure” from his CD “West of Rome.”

and so all you observers in your scrutiny
don’t count my scars like tree rings
my jigsaw disposition, it’s piecemeal properties
are either smoked or honey cured
by the panic pure

Related:

• Vic Chesnutt’s early December interview with Terry Gross on Fresh Air (audio, 39 min)
• Fresh Air’s follow-up story following Vic Chesnutt’s death (audio, 46 min 45 sec)

music